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The Hoe Show

$42.67 CAD
Free shipping when you spend $113.84+ (United States only). Promotion auto-applied on checkout.

Tend your garden. Mind your takes.

The Hoe Show is a parody dressed in full Victorian botanical regalia... ornate engraving, curling vines, and just enough patriarchy subtext to make people look twice. A garden-tool pun with a graduate degree, printed deep green on green.

Cultivated commentary, meet original content. It's a shirt for anyone who likes their takes well-watered, their humor a little smarter than it needs to be, and their parody capable of surviving a second look.

Whether you actually own a hoe or just appreciate a layered joke, this one rewards a closer read.

Why wear it?

  • Intricate botanical engraving that holds up close-up
  • A double-meaning that earns the double-take
  • Tonal green-on-green for a subtle, premium read
  • Heavyweight tee that wears soft and lived-in
  • Parody for people who like a little homework in their humor

Warning:

  • May require you to explain the joke (worth it)
  • May attract both gardeners and provocateurs
  • May start a debate about whose garden it is anyway
  • May be the most over-engineered pun you own

Some takes need tending.

Select size

More details

  • 100% ring-spun cotton
  • Heavyweight fabric (6.1 oz)
  • Relaxed fit

Size & Fit

View Size Chart

Quality Guarantee & Returns

  • Quality is guaranteed. If there is a print error or visible quality issue, we'll replace or refund it.
  • Because the products are made to order, we do not accept general returns or sizing-related returns.

The Hoe Show Size Guide

Size guide preview
Size label Length Width Sleeve length
S
26.62
18.25
16.25
M
28
20.25
17.75
L
29.37
22
19
XL
30.75
24
20 1/2
2XL
31.62
26
21.75
3XL
32 1/2
27.75
23.25
4XL
33 1/2
29.75
24.63

Supplier-provided measurements might differ by up to 2 inches (5 cm).

A useful tip is to compare these measurements with one of your own garments at home by measuring it similarly.

A Length

Begin at the collar on the top (high point shoulder) and draw the measuring tape down to the garment's bottom.

B Width

Start the measurement at the seam right below one sleeve and extend the tape across to the seam underneath the opposite sleeve.

C Sleeve length

Position the tape at the top of the set-in sleeve and extend it down to the sleeve's hem.

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